Super Bowl Backstory: Collieman

Superbowl 44: Unless you live in Indiana or Louisiana, or for some reason god-forsaken reason like the Colts or Saints, this year's matchup is going to be fairly boring. Sure, we have Peyton Manning, Reggie Wayne, Drew Brees, and Reggie Bush. But the rest of both rosters seem fairly uninteresting.
It was last week's AFC Championship game when Mr. Manning tore up the Jets secondary through the likes of an unsung hero. His name: Austin Collie. He is a very deceiving sonuvabitch, so I was determined to find out more about him. No one can just come into the NFL, having no previous college prestige, and do what this kid's been doing week in and week out. So, Mr. Number 17, I begin my investigative research.
Full name: Austin Kirk Collie
Born: November, 1985, Ontario, Canada
Drafted 127th overall, by the Colts, out of BYU.
Personal Accolades: Graduated with a 4.0 GPA, father, Scott, played in the CFL. Spent many nights in Buenos Aires doing missionary visits under the Church of Latter Day Saints.

All of this seems too mediocre. How can this kid, the 4th receiver on the depth chart, be this good? Hard work in school, good genes, God's help-all of these are normal now-a-day's. What does Austin Collie do that other 4th round picks don't do.
And then........

I found the answer

Pay to Play-or to advertise while they play

You would think that in the age of online advertising a company's interest in commercial television ads would not be atop their list. The Super Bowl draws more viewers than does the Pope's inaugural ceremony. Some people like to watch a man lead a Bronco's team to a last second victory more than they like to watch a man lead Catholicism to the butt of every late-night television joke.
Lets look at the numbers:
The 2008 game between the New York Giants and New England Patriots drew a 43.1 rating-meaning just over 43% of household televisions in the United States had the game on. Poor Brady! The game also had a record 97.4 million viewers. Both statistics are still records-slightly beating last year's numbers in the Steeler/Cardinal matchup.

The average television ad is 30 seconds.

The cost of a 30 second advertisement in 1967-Superbowl I-was $37,500. Coulda bought a Jeep!

20 years later- Superbowl XXI- the cost skyrocketed to $600,000.

Fast forward to 2002. The Bucs beat the Raiders 48-21. "Terry Tate, Office Linebacker" was introduced and soon after became an online phenomenon. Cost? $2.2 million.

The Associated Press reported that the average cost of an ad for this Super Bowl (Jets 41-Vikings 9) is roughly $2.6 Million!
In a "down" economy, it is mind numbing to think that some smaller companies-especially those with frozen credit lines from major banks- can even stand a chance to compete with the big wigs, i.e. Budweiser, Coke, Ford, and BP.
Hope you readers have some Sodoku, because unless you are willing to watch 16 different versions of "Ford:Drive One!" you're going to need something else to look forward to...

Go Gang Green!

P-D-G

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7GprriwKhQw

Old Age=Wisdom, Failed Organs, and a Possible 2nd Superbowl

Playoffs?!!???
Yes, it is that time of year again, and believe it or not, ya boy Brett Favre is still in the mix. You name it: 7 divisional championships, most career touchdowns and passing yard, toughest last name in sports to justify the spelling of, the ability to backstab the crap out of his former team by joining their undisputed biggest rival, ruining the Jets organization for an entire season, and plenty of PR work through the likings of make-a-wish foundation, Brett Favre is just, again, doing what we expect him to do.
Hate seeing him do, but doing what we expect nonetheless.

Today, in roughly 10 minutes, the Minnesota(Min-ay-sooo-tah) Vikings will take on America's Cowboys. Should make for an exciting NFC matchup, just so long as the Boys' defensive front comes to play with a game plan to plug the holes that Adrian Peterson has been shattering like a Haitian earthquake.

Back to topic-Brett Favre. Did anyone expect him not to come out of retirement for a second time? Probably not. Did anyone expect him not to be playing for a conference championship berth at this point in the season? Probably not. Born in October of 1969, here is a compiled list of other people Brett's age who, as long as their health has not run out by now, might be lucky enough to be watching the game from their big fat couch:

Jennifer Aniston- still fairly hot, yet not in any shape to take on Demarcus Ware and the rest of the 3-4

P.Diddy- Bet he never once played organized sports. At one point he may have been able to purchase the Vikings, but poor decision making, back taxes, and a failed attempt to "Make the Band" 6 times puts him out of the picture

Ice Cube- He still scares the shit out of me, but from what I am told, NFL players play on a very high level, requiring strong intelligence and decision making skills. However, Pacman Jones did make it a career for a few years..

And finally, Marilyn Manson. If football was smut pornography, and the Cowboys were edward scissorhands-esque characters, M squared might stand a chance. Not here, not now.

In close, what we realized is that Brett Favre really is a phenom of some sort. Maybe a few years of alcoholism and addiction to prescription pain killers does make the body last a bit longer. I truly hope that this time next year we will not be able to comment any further on Fav Ruh, but, we know we will be. To give hope to those middle aged men who are still living vicariously through Brett, good luck to you. But we all know, at some point in time, luck does run out....

Go Jets!

-Pico DeGalo