Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Go - Go - Gadget Rhythm

For those of you readers who have never been to Washington DC, one of their favorite claim-to-fames is the creation of Go-Go music. Typically, youll recognize this music as that black dude who hangs out side the Metro stops, drummin' away on buckets, pots and pans, cowbells, or whatever kind of percussion he can find. All done at an extremely fast pace.

Expanding on this during the 1970s, a drum circle began in Meridian Park/Malcolm X Park in the Northwest quadrant of Washington DC. It is currently the longest running drum circle in the nation. Gathering every sunday from 3-9 pm, drummers are invited to contribute to a rhythm that makes you drum, dance, or just sit in complete enchantment.

Last weekend, not only did I have the opportunity to visit the infamous drum circle, but I actually partook in the experience. Bringing my bass conga at the initial get-go at 3:00 sharp, myself and about 3 others literally started it. "Hosted" by a man named Experience ( an overweight black man wearing a bucket hat, a black kilt, and an american flag sleeve-cut tee) we jammed until the neighborhood rocked and the kids were a dancin'.

As you may have caught, drumming is not the only joy to be offered. Some attend just to feel the groove and dance the hot summer heat away. Ranging from short haired middle aged women to freaky youngens, all type and colors get down to the sound of the beat.

If your every in the neighborhood on those sundays, grab a triangle, a symbol, or a textbook and go bang away. You wont regret it.

(Apologies for the video quality - apparently BlackBerries arent all their talked up to be)

Keep on Skankin'
Abe Froman

Monday, May 31, 2010


For the delay. I got extremely tired of directing myself to our page and finding a 2 week old post. PSA-we need the help of the entire staff again. Until the horse is re-sattled, here are some great pictures.
Silly Donovan McNabb

Funny Boner Kid

Shaq loves Juice

Helpful Help

..See ya after finals!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

What a bunch of bull(testicle extract)!

The notion that Redbull gives you wings is as easily accepted as Flu shots, body shots, and Lil Jon's club banger "Shots, Shots, Sho-Sho-Sho-Shots!" However, no on really takes the time out of their day to figure out what exactly inside of that 16oz. aluminum can of man that actually gives them the wings.
Redbull, and many other similar, yet less appealing, energy drinks have a combination of ingredients that makes us feel like a 12 yr old at your neighbors sleepover party all hopped up on mountain dew. Some might think caffeine-but does coffee give you wings? No. Its not the caffeine, bra, its the Taurine!
Sure, taurine sounds safe, it is an organic amino acid. Its found naturally in foods such as different types of seafoods and meats. Does the shit actually work?
A review published in 2008 found no documented reports of negative health effects associated with the amount of taurine used in energy drinks, concluding that "The amounts of guarana, taurine, and ginseng found in popular energy drinks are far below the amounts expected to deliver either therapeutic benefits or adverse events." Hmm...
While accessing the Redbull official website, I wanted to find a statement which outlined the proper usage; I found 5.
1.Water and appropriate sports drinks should be used for rehydration as outlined in the NFHS Document “Position Statement and Recommendations for Hydration to Minimize the Risk for Dehydration and Heat Illness.”
2. Energy drinks should not be used for hydration.
3. Information about the absence of benefit and the presence of potential risk associated with energy drinks should be widely shared among all individuals who interact with young athletes.
4. Energy drinks should not be consumed by athletes who are dehydrated.
5. Energy drinks should not be consumed without prior medical approval, by athletes taking over the counter or prescription medications.

So..don't drink Redbull when you're dehydrated, or an athlete, or young, or on medication. Shit, I literally fall under every category.

As the Wu would say, "Protect ya neck!"

I wish the song was called "Protect your heart, mental stability, and overall well being. I guess well just have to wait for their 16th album.

Redbull doesn't give you wings, folks, it gives you a placebo effect and a damn good belly ache!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

A jaahhhbbiiiieeee!!!

Bing, bang, boom. That fast. Start college, meaningless testings, blackouts, hookups, bed pisses, public indecency, fights, football games, spring concerts, bank overdrafts, graduation. Cheers to all those who told you "have fun, four years goes by so fast."
Man I bet those guys really wish we found them to say, "hey, you were right," just to be one-upped with a good ol' American "Told ya so."
Now the easy part.
Youre either
A: A dickless lizard who is too scared to enter the work world so you entertain the idea of graduate school, Euro-tripping, or living the dream from home
B: employed.

As of today, the American unemployment rating is 9.9%. So much for roundin' up...
In 1976, the year my mother graduated college, the US was looking at a 7.7% rating-not too bad.

With government programs, internships, and entry level jobs, I find all of the hoop-la surrounding the difficulty to get a job now a days to be horse crap. I will be the first to say that I am ecstatic about the fact that I have secured a job starting after graduation, but I am by no means the "elite."

That being said, I feel that recent college graduates are too quick to accept the notion that "things are tough" and that "the current economy" is going to prevent you from getting a job. If anything, employers are looking for hungry graduates, fresh off their finals, and willing and able to work more proficiently for probably far lower wages.
Look at this guy:(!)

The moment you start believing that there are no jobs available is the exact time that jobs become unavailable. It is an insult to our generation to go for 4 years, funded by your parents hard labor, only to get your degree and shit the bed.
Call it a cry or a PSA, just don't blame it on the economy.
Don't fret, don't complain, and don't accept failure. Look at fatty, he's fully aware and has been seeking benefits from a high unemployment rating and he still finds a way to smile!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Marketing gone Mad

Thanks to our genius friends on Madison Avenue, we have now possibly the worst marketing idea to hit the streets since Digimon key chains.

In the Spring of 2010, MillerCoors introduced a new concept that they believed would revolutionize the "pour", the "chug" and the "dump beer on your passed our frat buddy". Its called the Vortex Bottle and it has - no way! - specially designed grooves. Supposed to create a more even flow of "that great pilsner taste" as it comes through the corkscrew bottle neck.

A bit like a ribbed Trojan condom, the interior of the bottle has grooves that resemble the barrel of a gun. Yes, thats right. The Miller Vortex bottle took drinking to THAT level.

The idea behind the stupidity is that the beer will actually get caught in what is known as the coriolis effect as gravity forces it to take a downward-centripetal force. This effect can be seen as a toilet bowl flushes or in an elementary classrooms with our favorite two-liter toy. Those things were flippin sweet!

Did MillerCoors actually expect us to chug for more than 3 seconds while spinning our bottle/heads in a circular motion to get maximum velocity? This is beer were talking here! Are we forgetting that the average college student hold onto a bottle of beer for, maybe, ten minutes? C'mon man, lets focus our attention on better things. Really.

I actually had the privilege of trying one of these out. As I purchased the 18-pack of bottle necks, I unintentionally grabbed the one that came equipped with such baggage. No wonder they were so cheap. Myself, as well as three other accomplices were mezmerized as we peered into the innovative neck appearance, all wondering how it would affect our consumption. Not one bit.

I've heard of some dumb ideas - I highly recommend you check them out for an absolute laugh -but I believe this one takes the cake. Clearly, some things are for some people and not others. But this has absolutely no affect on it whatsoever.

If you see a case at the liquor store, pick one up and try it. At least they're cheaper than normal bottlenecks.

Keep chugging my friends,
Abe Froman

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Kentucky fried Derby

First Saturday in May people. Located at Church Hill Downs in Louisville, Kentucky, this 1 1/4 mile race is known to many in America as "The most exciting 2 minutes in sports." Aside from offering viewers the opportunity to watch a televised production of animal cruelty combined with public indecency, the Kentucky Derby allows people to convince themselves that they actually give a shit about the medieval sport.
Not many sporting events grind my gears as hard as the Kentucky Derby does. Hundreds of people make their way to Louisville every May to punch their overpriced tickets to gain entry to the "infield" where they get rained and pooped on all the while paying $10 for warm Amstell Lights.
Sure, buying a $2 bet makes you at least somewhat interested in the race, but it certainly does not turn you into a gambling pro or a horse racing fan. While watching the disgrace race on NBC, its not surprising to witness mile-highs (big winners) and valley lows (people realizing they may have lost everything on that stupid "to-win" bet on Big Brown.
While walking around Chicago on today's "derby day" I had to try hard from losing my mind and throwing a drink on some punk in a pink sears-sucker suit. People were hammered and dressed to the nines. Bow ties, three piece suits, and those dod damn hats.
Seriously, what other American event causes people to literally strain their necks with 15lbs. of just junk on their heads? I mean women literally plop on their fat heads what looks like an Easter basket. You don't see people painting themselves red, white, and blue for July 4th.
Take this post as a PSA or a plea...people, there are 365 more days until the next Kentucky Derby, please, try harder everyday to remove yourself more and more from the god-forsaken sport of derby racing.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


So its a week early. Next Wednesday marks everyone's favorite holiday (and birthday)...Cinco De Mayo. Just like all American celebrations, no one cares to figure out why they are celebrating so long as there is plenty of booze and stupid music to bop around to. I have been dually celebrating this day for what will be 22 years, and not one of them did I have any idea why.

The holiday commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely victory over French forces at the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862.
Similar to St. Patrick's Day or the Chinese New Year, Cinco De Mayo Cinco de Mayo is observed by many Americans regardless of ethnic origin. I mean cmon, throw on a sombraro and grab a case of Dos Equis and you're just like the rest of em'.

So, basically, after researching the crap out of the holiday....all I got was information on this battle from like 200 years ago(boring!). I decided to find some funny information on Mexico/Mexicans to spice up this post. Here goes:

Q: What do you call a Mexican on a riding lawnmower?
A: Promoted

Q: What do you call a Mexican baptism?
A: Bean Dip

Q: What do you call a midget Mexican?
A: Paragraph (He's too short to be an essay)

What is Mexican Poop??

108 Million people live in Mexico.
The second largest factor of the Mexican economy is American money being sent back.
Mexicans love to sleep (siesta)

Way down, South of the border
Way down, Mexico way
They’re having a big celebration
It’s on the 5th of May.

You can hear the castanets, they’re playing.
You can hear maracas keep the beat.
You can hear the guitars wildly playing.
You can watch them dancing in the street.

Oh, Cinco de Mayo.
It’s a Mexican holiday.
Oh, Cinco de Mayo.
It’s the 5th of May.